Tipping Point

I’ve settled back in to the daily commute with the new job. It’s not too different than what I had previously. I’m just one stop further on the T (i.e. local subway). And yet I seem to be see-sawing back and forth. The commute has just tipped over an hour. If I told you that I had added an extra ten minutes to my commute (there’s a longer walk too), that doesn’t sound too bad. But if I tell you that my commute now can take over an hour (about 70+ minutes), you may cringe (unless you have a worse commute, which there are plenty out there). Now if I tell you the same 70+ minute commute takes me less than half that time (about 30 minutes door to door at peak commute times) to drive, you may think I’m crazy.

I’ve always been pro-public transportation. I get a ton of reading done. I sometimes crank on an interesting knitting project. I’ve had some crazy subway sittings that are priceless. And needless to say it’s better for the environment and my wallet. But where is that tipping point where you value your limited personal time against all these other elements?

I have a monthly $59 commuter pass. However, on occasion, I’ve had to drive in and boy does that hurt. One, I have an awesomely nice and comfortable car. Second, the commute is less frustrating - I take a different route than my bus and the flow of traffic is just that a flow not a quagmire. And finally, I’m there in no time. That’s an extra 45 minutes I just freed up: to dawdle getting ready in the morning, sleeping in, or even to get into work earlier and crank more efficiently. And that’s just at the beginning of the day. There’s another 45 minutes I get to pick up at the end of the day - getting home that much sooner. Some nights, the commute hurts at the end. I just want to be home. I’m hungry, tired and done with the day. But am stuck on a bus or else waiting for a bus.

What’s kept me back is… I’d like to say the environment but it’s the money. Parking is $11/day, potentially more. On a good month that’s $220/month. So not even counting gas money that’s no chump change. Basically I’m saving $2,000 a year by not driving. And saving the earth in my little way.
Then comes last Wednesday night. I was finally on the news… indirectly. The MBTA (umbrella company for subway, busses, etc) is not doing so well. Budgets aren’t working out and maintenance isn’t getting done. The whole system is breaking down. The delays are getting longer and more frequent. On my way to work, I’ll hear about a disabled train up ahead causing delays. Well, I finally was on one - the mother of all disabled trains.

I’m on my way home from work. The irony is that I decided to leave ‘early’, i.e. not stay late. It was just after 6 pm and I was engrossed in my book, just near the end, although probably wouldn’t finish it during this commute. It was on Louis XVI’s trial and I was riveted even though we all know how that went for dear old Louis. We stopped just shy of the stop before my stop. Nothing unusual. The operators pop onto the intercom every few minutes saying they are working on the problem and we’ll be moving soon. I hear this spiel several times a week. Well, long story short. I finished my book. And finished the paper I had with me. It’s a good two and a half hours stuck. The subway just broke down and nothing they did could get it going. They finally had us deboard. At first we envisioned jumping off the subway car into the dark tunnel with the rats scurrying away and all of us trying to remember which is the third rail so that we don’t get electrocuted. In reality, they just pulled another subway train up behind ours and had us walk from one to the other. Except you didn’t know this. As we walked single file through empty subway trains, I felt like I was walking to my death in a light hearted way (probably because I had just read about Louis on his way to the guillotine). It was surreal.

All in all, I enjoyed the adventure. I had nothing I was late too and we had air (and AC) for a good chunk of the time. There was a comradery amongst us crammed in the subway with folks taking turns offering their seats to stand. Granted, by the time I got home around 9:30, I was ravenous and the cursing the fridge was empty. And I had done the math and realized that the time it took me to get from work to home was the same length of time it took me the week before to fly from Costa Rica back to the US (to Atlanta where my lay-over was). Just to put it in perspective.

So will I crumble eventually and start taking the car? It’s been a few days and not yet. I do wonder, if this wasn’t the tipping point, what will? Or perhaps, it’s better not to ask.

Falling

It’s funny what you end up blogging about. And when I write ‘you’, I mean ‘me’ of course. You would think I would be waxing poetic on the marvels of life and philosophizing about the meaning of it all. Instead, I find myself inclined to write about embarrassing clumsy moments. So to back up, let me provide you with a little context:

1. First, I live/work in Boston and if you’re not familiar with this little town - there are a lot of brick sidewalks. And there are a lot of cobblestone sidewalks. In short, it’s treacherous.

2. Second, I work in a professional environment where my dress code includes high heels. I’ve started wearing shorter heals, but they’re still a good 2-3 inches.

3. Third, I walk a bunch. I walk to public transportation. I walk to work. I walk home. I walk running errands (funny oxymoron there). I’ve clocked a bunch of miles.

4. And finally I will sometimes read… while walking… in heals… on cobblestones.

And have I ever stumbled - absolutely. Has it been embarrassing - sometimes, even when no one is around. But have I ever fallen. Nope. I was thinking about this last night, and I think the last time I actually fell down was back in 2000 when I was trying my hand at snowboarding. In that case, after a day on the bunny slope and falling down all day, I had enough and walked away from it all.

So yesterday, as I was on my way to meet up with friends after work, I was absolutely stunned when I took a nose dive on a Boston city sidewalk. The thing was - I had changed at work to jeans and flats. I was on a paved concrete sidewalk. And I wasn’t reading. It made absolutely no sense that of all the times I would fall it was now. And at first I thought I was just stumbling and then there was that moment of realization as you are moving in slow motion that I wouldn’t be able to recover and I was going down. And going down hard. And there I was sprawled on the sidewalk. I was so stunned. A lady quickly walked by me unconcerned and it was a gentleman across the street that yelled out “Are you ok?” I was mad at…. What? I had nothing to blame. Not the shoes, not the sidewalk. There was no black ice or slippery wet grate. Was it a lazy left foot? Was I walking too fast since I was running late? Was I preoccupied and stressed with everything on my plate that my body short-circuited on me? What was it? And it wasn’t until a few blocks later that I started to feel the pain. And it wasn’t until a few hours later on my way home that my right knee started throbbing and swelling up and I realized the pineapple-blueberry martini I had was way too weak!

Perhaps it is the little things that put life in perspective. The classic tale of taking for granted such things as the mechanical capabilities of your limbs and all that is involved for them to coordinate effectively in movement. Or perhaps this is a tale of stopping to smell the roses. Slowing down and not traveling at warp speed. Or it could be a reminder that I’m not a young chicken anymore. Or I just needed a humbling moment. Or it could be it means nothing. That it was quickly forgotten once I joined my friends and celebrated a farewell for an old colleague. A passing moment… captured in my blog.

Costa Rica!

I'm sitting here early in the morning have a ham and cheese croissant, danish and freshly squeezed OJ on the veranda of a gorgeous hotel complex in San Jose.  Last night when I arrived, driving down the lit driveway with coffee plantations on either side to the grand entrance, I realized I may have to reevaluate my top 5 hotels of all time I've stayed in.  I'm thinking the old-time, wood-paneled B&B we stayed in in York may get bumped out.

There's a great use of cross ventilations - open spaces and just general vernacular architecture being used.  I remembered to bring my camera so will hopefully snag a few pictures.  It's overcast right now with the energy of the T-storms in the air - but no rain yet.  My hotel room steps out onto a private veranda that leads down to a gorgeous swimming pool (not private).  I think it's the off-season as the place isn't crowded which gives you a sense of more intamacy.

Well, off to my first project meeting of the day.  I wanted to capture this moment as I look out at banana trees and the hustle and bustle of the morning get started for folks.  I have a back log of posts written while off-line that I haven't had a chance to throw up.  My new routine seems to be lacking a place to regularly blog.  So excuse my absense for the moment.

Atlanta Trip

I’m heading down to Atlanta for a conference. It starts first thing Monday so have to leave the night before. It’s been a bunch of ups and downs so far:


1. This morning I thought my flight was at 4:30. It was at 5:30 so gained an hour!

2. Ready to leave and can’t find a cab. Getting into the danger zone. First cab I reserve is a no show after 20 minutes of waiting. So reserve another cab to come. First cab arrives but is just a big black SUV with no signage. A bit sketchy. And the second cab guy says they’ve seen some shady dealings with this guy - he’s not licensed, etc. I decide to play it safe. But am running seriously late - a bit of a downer.

3. Second cab shows up minutes later and while racing to the airport I talk with the guy at dispatch and apparently the first cab driver calls to cancel my pick-up, to mess with me. But Marco, from the second cab company knows whats what and asks to speak with the woman (me) who placed the order. He’s got my back and this after doing some switching to get me a cab as quickly as possible. I’m in good hands.

4. Get to the airport and run to the desk. I thought I had made it in time since I still had 25 minutes plus. Nope, they shut down ticket issuing 30 minutes prior. I missed my flight and need to pay a fee to catch another flight. And I think they made me wait in line for 5 minutes. Bummer!

5. But there’s another flight an hour later. And when I find out the airline charges for checked bags I tell the lady behind the counter - never mind, I’ll just carry my luggage on. So she cancels that charge and only processes the penalty fee charge. Except the computer messes up and processes the checked bag sticker but doesn’t charge me. Sweet!

6. I’m on the plane and realize I lost one of my earrings. I look everywhere, but it’s gone. I’m going to miss the pair of earrings. They were good classics. Bummer. (But I’ll keep the lone earring in case my mom loses one of hers- I had given her the same exact pair too).

7. Turns out the plane has wi-fi - a first for me. I can get a bunch of work done!

8. The wi-fi isn’t free - bummer.

9. Guess I can’t do work and will have to watch a Netflix DVD I brought. Fun!

10. My work computer doesn’t seem to read DVDs.


11. I brought my external hardrive that has a selection of movies. Yay for being prepared with contingency plans.

12. Turns out my computer can play the movie - but only the audio part. I’m supposed to get a new laptop in the next week to replace this one since it’s wonky when it comes to images on websites. Apparently it spills over into playing videos. Even the sample video that is automatically loaded won’t play - sound only. Unfortunately for now I’m stuck with this videoless playing laptop.

13. So I get to write yet another journal entry to post later (I think this is the fourth one that hasn’t seen the light of the internet). Staying on top of things and decide to listen to RockNRolla - I just watched is last week so almost as good as originally planned!

14. Find out my keyboard is old and the keys don’t always register - mostly the spacebar. It’s really annoying! I’m glad I’m getting a new laptop soon.

15. The air hostess just gave me two bags of pretzels. Makes me feel special, especially since I grabbed a cup of clam chowder from Legal Seafood, which is not enough of a dinner. Although still very good and worth it! I love me a good chowder.

16. The battery gauge went from 1:30 left to 4:10 hours and then down to 2+ hours and now it’s completely disappeared so am driving blind. The Amtrak from Monday had outlets to plug into. I guess economy on domestic hasn’t caught up yet. This plane doesn’t even have TVs. 


17. Sitting at the back of the plane has its advantages. While waiting to deboard, I figure I’ll check one last time for the missing earring. Turns out when they say you can use your seat as a flotation devise they mean it. It’s just attached by Velcro. Underneath, in amongst the crumbs was my earring!

18. A week later, I get home after running errands and realize I lost an earring. Same pair. I should have learned from the first scare. I recheck everywhere including in the car. A week later I’m detailing the winter crud away inside and here a noise that the vacuum picks up. Didn’t put two and two together at the time. But think it might be the earring. What’s the chances that my friend Aaron hasn’t emptied his shopvak in the garage for the last month? Not good. I think the earring is gone, bummer. But I have a really clean car which means I can end this post on an up note.

Do you like how I didn't even talk about Atlanta?

First Week

I just made it through my first week at the new job. It always unfolds differently than you predict. Before starting, I had imagined myself being completely, drop-dead exhausted from the new routine and information and sensory overload. Considering I had two back to back nights that didn’t get me home until after 10 pm: an evening class and then a professional development event I was presenting at – I was doing pretty well. I was taking stock of things Friday night and thought how much I underestimated the capacity of my wonderful self. And then Saturday afternoon hit and all the grandiose plans of items I was going to accomplish this weekend had to be mostly rescheduled. But much more in alignment with the norm and what I expected.

Now it is Monday and I just popped down to NYC for the day. I really wanted to write that as it sounds so smart. But the truth of the matter is that although I tried to recharge and rest up this weekend, it was all thrown out the window this morning having to catch a 6 am train (which was a 5 am wake up). It was a sleepless night. I really need to find a new alarm clock that I know works 100% of the time. Even still I had scheduled a taxi pick-up so knew I had a check and balance so should have slept better than I had.

It’s been quite awhile since I was last in NYC . Popping up on the busy city streets outside of Penn Station, I was struck at how different and unique New York is. And everyone was so…. New Yorkish. It was a whirlwind day before I found myself back on the train full of suits… and all predominately using Think Pads. Just what I have personally and now for work. Although the work laptop I had to leave at work as I found myself packing up Friday afternoon only to discover the laptop and not the docking station was locked (as I was incorrectly led to believe). And no help as everyone had gone for the day. I need to get that resolved tomorrow.

Work last week was mainly an overload of meeting people. The company has hundreds of employees and the Boston HQ is spread over 8+ floors. And I have to say the engineering world hasn’t shifted too much from the days I was in it – comprised I would say by about 80-90% white young to middle-age men. All with pretty much the same names – Jims and Johns and Joes, Mikes and Matts and Marks, Bens and Brians and Bobs. And no cheat sheet! No master list with pictures, job roles and seating assignments. I may have to do some recon and buy one of those pens that are cameras and make my own master list.

There’s so much – my job being one that crosses several departments and is throughout almost all aspects of a project from working to the land the gig to following up with clients after the project is completed and everything in between. So a lot of my time right now is absorbing everything and making sense of it all. Understanding what are the key items and what are the “wouldn’t it be great if” items. There are a lot of opportunities and a lot to achieve which makes it hard to turn the brain off at times. But I’m settling in and looking forward to what is to come and finally mastering the names of my cohorts in crime.

4 Days And Counting Down

Monday is quickly approaching.  (Is fastly a word?  I had to switch it out just now).  And I'm heading out of town tomorrow.  Which means I really only have about 18 hours of non-sleep/non-out-of-town time left.  Not much as I try to get everything wrapped up.  I've found I've been kicking myself with my nemesis - the eternal "shoulds".  As in, "I should have done this... or that".    I was thinking about the content of my next blog post and about how I hadn't really tackled my great american novel, or rebalanced my retirement accounts and set up investment portfolios, or tried out all those cooking recipes I wanted too or got into a good excercising routine.  And I realized that was unrealistic.  That's how the "shoulds" are though after all - unrealistic expectations.  Instead I shall be celebrating the "dids":  the big and the small, the expected and unexpected, the small discoveries.

• Weeding - with a limited budget, I did the opposite of retail therapy.  I went through my things and started weeding out the stuff I love but don't really need.  For me this usually takes a few rounds.  Pick the easy stuff first round and just keep digging in subsequent rounds.  I do this with clothing on a regular basis but this year I also tackled other stuff including the once completely off-bounds - books.  I'm on Cicero's side of a room needing books.  And true to point, every room in my place has books of some sort - excluding closets.
• Spring Cleaning - I hate cleaning (have I mentioned that before).  But I notice the dirt/dust/grime, especially right before guests come over which is when you have the least amount of time.  My idea was to do an entire spring cleaning.  Although I didn't do all of it, I do have to give myself that I accomplished a good chunk.
• W+W - I was suprised about how my time off worked with my guys - Walter and Winston.  I've spent a lot more snuggle time and our routines completely changed.  I hope they are able to cope with S-withdrawl.
• Projects - This one is the kicker.  I was able to knock off a few projects that have been on "the list" for awhile.  But really the big take away, is that for the remaining ones - of which there are a lot, the question is "If I didn't tackle this project when I had time off from work, will I really ever tackle the project?"  The classic case of if not now, than when would this ever happen.  This has helped with the first item I listed.  I'm able to let go of more things now.  This time is a good test of reality.
• Travel - I think I spent less time visiting folks than I do when carrying a full time job in the mix of things.  Funny, isn't it?  Part was financial and keeping to a tight budget but also it had to do with recharging the batteries too and segues well into the next item...
• Pace - This time off allowed me to shift my pace of life.  Sit back and enjoy things differently.  In a strange way I think it had the effect of speeding time up for me too.  After all, time is a man-made construct.  Of course it was a challenge having the pace of a retired life meshing with the pace of the working world I was still a part of through some side projects.
• Cooking - I thought for sure I'd be cooking up all these great meals and trying out new recipes.  Instead I realized more about how I am with meals and food.  I work best cooking for others.  I did find myself slowly clearing out the pantry.  As a result I came up with some interesting meals.  I suprised myself with this great quiche that required absolutely no shopping - I had all the ingredients on hand.  Usually when I'm trying out new recipes I've got to make a run to the store to get the fresh veggies or other items.
• Indulgences - Being able to unplug does allow for any addictions you may be inclined towards to float to the top.  For me, I found my sweet-tooth got sweeter.  I organized the hell out of alot of stuff.  And found that I have a preclition towards movies and tv.  I think my downfall was the system I put in place at the end of last year.  I don't have cable - instead I have the ability to watch an almost unlimitless selection of movies and television shows through my netflix and hulu subscriptions on my TV.  Before, it was relatively easy to say no to the junk on tv.  But now.  Oh my lord.  I've had fun with the creative and smart shows and movies I've stumbled upon.  In a way I was able to swap media based on availability.  Before I read a ton due to my 2+ hour commute time spent each day.  Now I've been able to explore the video realm. 
• And finally, I was able to recharge the batteries.  I think I've been experiencing professional burn-out for awhile.  Having a break from the work world has made a world of difference.

All in all, this hiatus has been just about perfect.  Especially if you look at what I was able to discover and get done.

I'm Back ... Kind Of

How the time flys!  I've been enjoying some time being unplugged but am getting back into the swing of things now.  My little hiatus is coming to a close.  I realized after I got a few sweet emails from friends and family this past week that I should throw up something of an update.  So here it is in bullet format:

• I got a job - heading up the sustainability department at a major company here in Boston.  Great opportunity that kind of fell in my lap.  I start a week from Monday.
• The countdown has begun and I'm stressing out trying to get done everything I wanted to get done with this time off.  
• My pair of february socks morphed into finishing a scarf for a friend that was long over due.  Pictures to be posted later, hopefully. 
• I haven't started March's pair yet.  The countdown is ticking.
• Here's a link to an adorable picture of the sweater being modeled by the new owner that I posted about back in January.  How perfect is that? 
• All the snow is melting.  I'm in denial about winter coming to a close.  I'm probably the only one within a 100 mile radius.  I love winter, especially good snowy winters.
• I'm heading up to VT next weekend for the sugarbush open houses and two friends are coming - Bill and Dawn.  It's become a bit of a tradition (i.e. this will be the second time).  I've got a few great menu ideas I want to try out and share.  But I'm a bit stumped about what amazing piece de resistance for the best meal of  the day.  I love breakfast food but egg dishes and gluten are off the menu.  That leaves hot ceral and me digging a bit more in the recipe books.  The countdown continues.

So that's most barely everything in a nutshell and me off to do some more counting.